I’m Still Here

I know it’s been forever since my last post.  I’m not sure where the time has gone.  Lots to catch up….my parents were in town over the 4th of July holiday and we went to visit John and his family.  I unfortunately was sick the entire time and required lots of rest.  For the first time also, I had a hard time with smells and food.  In all the time I’ve been in treatment I had not felt that bad or been that nauseous.  Hope I never have to do that again.  It lasted about a week, so bad I skipped a treatment because I just wasn’t up to it.  Sometimes you just have to listen to your body.  Meanwhile, I feel as though I lost a week of time.

Then there are wedding plans….good thing mom came when she did, details….details.  Even a small wedding requires decisions and I’m not very good at making them right now.  We got a lot done though.  Let me just say too, I have a great fiance who takes care of lots of details too.

As I reflect on the past couple weeks that have been highs and lows, I’m reminded of God’s faithfulness in the good and the bad.  He continues to walk me through this.  Some days I lose sight of Him and it’s not Him who moved but me who moved my eyes.  I will confess there are times I’ve begged it to be taken away, I just feel like I can’t do it anymore and He gently reminds me that I can’t do it on my own and He has me covered.  I’m reminded of all the prayer warriors that are out there.  I continue to fight and trust Him completely for my healing.

We celebrate the latest brain scan last week, it shows improvement of the brain mets and they weren’t visible in latest scan.  There are marks from the radiation but overall, Dr. Kerr was very pleased with the results.  In addition, I have been selected for the trial drug and will begin that with my chemo treatment this Friday (July 16th).  The regimen is complicated so I won’t bore you with details, just know that I have my work cut out for me with trips to the chemo infusion room.  Cancer is a full time job, between infusions and resting to build my strength back up for the next time.  But as I prayed today, I will persevere…

“You have made known to me the path of life; you fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.”  — Psalm 16:11


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3 responses to “I’m Still Here

  1. Diane

    Giving praises that you were selected for the trial drug. We continue to pray for you and we love you my friend.

  2. Tausha

    Praying for strength for you and looking forward to hearing about all the exciting plans!
    Love you & miss you!


  3. Jan G

    Thanking God that you won the clinical trial lotto. Feeling lucky? 🙂 Not so much, huh. Praying for and loving you this morning. Woke up thinking how tired of it all you must be and yet how strong you are! I cannot imagine, but my head knows that God increases His grace even when it doesn’t ‘feel’ like it. The wedding plans are wonderful and we will all be celebrating with you my beautiful friend. When I think about your sweet story, I laughingly think, Who Knew? 🙂 a line that always reminds me of you. Talk soon.

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